An example of a fortune teller. (But not ours... couldn't get a good picture of it.)

At Nuku two weeks ago, Diane and I submitted a “fortune teller” for the origami contest. These were all the craze when we were in elementary school. I was surprised that I actually remembered how to make one. Diane and I then wrote all the fortunes in haiku. I thought I’d share them all with you… Warning: These are a bit pessimistic, symbolizing my general lack of belief in the legitimacy of fortune-telling. (I can’t say why Diane is so pessimistic; however, she did write the only happy fortune–the first one below.)

Your future is bright.
Happiness is within reach.
Go out and grab it!

Superman you are not
You shouldn’t have lifted that
Dresser by yourself.

That library book
Was due fifteen weeks ago.
Say the dog ate it.

What is your question?
It doesn’t really matter;
Fortunes are for shit.

No good news for you.
Why did you wake up today?
Just go back to bed.

One million dollars
You will not receive. Sorry.
Ain’t no free lunches.

Mr. Right is near.
But, alas, not here. So keep
The search going, dear.

Your dog has rabies;
Your cat ate your goldfish.
You shouldn’t own pets.

Well, you have to give us credit. We wrote all these in five minutes. I didn’t say they were life-changing. They’re just kind of cute. Unfortunately, our ingenuity did not win us one of the nifty journals nor the hot chocolate mixes they had as door prizes…

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